Friday Fictioneers: the colour of memory

Friday being valentine’s day, it seemed impossible not to weave the theme of romance into this week’s Friday Fictioneer challenge.

Go here to find out more about Rochelle Wishoff-fields and her Friday Fictioneers.  Read all the other entries here.  In brief, the challenge is to write a 100-word story with a beginning, middle and end inspired by a picture prompt. The restriction is strangely addictive!  Here’s my story below:

Punch-drunk

They’re celebrating my exhibition in the gallery next door, laughing as they drink Zednya’s famous fruit punch. She’s skillfully showing the collectors around, telling them about each Memory Painting. How like apparitions, they flash into my mind when I’ve forgotten everything else, even my name.  All I remember are those vivid images just before the explosion, tormenting until I finally release them onto canvas.  Then they disappear, no longer troubling me.

Except this one.

Zednya believes she’s just another ghost from that time. Girl Unknown.

I think about her crushed strawberry lips.  Wondering if she survived somehow, remembering her dress.

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22 thoughts on “Friday Fictioneers: the colour of memory

    • Ha! Thanks very much for your comment and your point about the comma. You have no idea how much I wrestled with that very comma you mention! 🙂 (Well, looking at your own blog, I think you probably do! :-)) I debated having the “pauses” which 3 commas in a relatively short sentence would introduce, or having a more free-flowing sentence without losing the sense, and opted for the latter. But I’m open to re-considering!

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      • i know what you mean and I know I’m more pro-comma than some. Personally, I read ‘like apparitions’ as a sub cluase which therefore needs commas both sides, but if you want to minimise the commas, I’d go with ‘how llike apparitions:’ and make the how part of this clause. Then you’d only be left with one comma … And one, far more classy, colon! Just my 2p

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